Whose Line is it Evoways?
by bobtheheadlesschicken
Summary: It's humor. It's all my reviewers happy (except one who has no accountdoesn't want to log in and didn't quite explain) . Why don't you be next? Oooh suggest new games commedians go ahead...
1. Default Chapter

Okay for STNR I'm having a tiny bit of writers block so here goes a filler story for you maniacs. Oh and thank you xfan2003 for suggesting me to do comedy. Oh and L101E did this marvel style so I'll try not to use any of his ideas. Whose Line is it Evoways? I know stupid pun heh. Episode 1. Guest members: Pyro, Piotr, and Pietro. Standard: Wolverine. Host Ky Williamson.  
  
"Welcome to 'Whose Line is it Evoways?' Where the points don't matter like what age Logan is. I'm your host Ky Williamson!" she yells starting the show. Logan is glaring at her about the comment. "He's a maniac, Maniac! Pyrooooo!" Pyro starts laughing madly and sends a lion around the audience. "And he ran! He ran so far away! He just Ran! His name's Pieeetrooo!" Pietro runs around the room and then slicks his hair back for the camera. "He's Mr. Colossus!" (Mr. Roboto...) Piotr armored up then unarmored. "If I say anything about him he'll kill me he's Wolvie! Uh I mean Wolverine!"   
  
"You're pushin' it bub." growled Wolverine.  
  
"Alright the first game is Superheroes... uh heh who suggested this? Anyways this is for all four of you. Pyro will start as Mr.?" asked Ky.  
  
"Crazy Austrailian dude!" suggested all the people in the audience.   
  
"It's not supposed to be real..."  
  
"Uh Fire Man in lederhosen!" yelled a cameraman.  
  
"Crazy Austrailian Dude it is!" yelled Ky. "Now the emergency is Someone broke Scott's glasses and burned the company that made them. Ouch. Scott the writers must hate you. What am I saying? I'm the writer!" Ky signals for Pyro to start and hides under her desk.   
  
"Well I hate Scott but I guess we'd better get him some new glasses." said Pyro when Logan jumped onto the landing in the area where Pyro was. "Hi, Mr. Obsessive Drunken Canadian Dude!"  
  
"What's the emergency? I sho am drunk." Logan mumbled staggering around. "Hey Mr. Terminator. Is the ceiling supposed to spin?"   
  
"No. But if we kill the puny Scott we would not have to fix this problem in the first place. Isn't that right Speed Demon?" asked Colossus in a Arnold voice.  
  
"Yea-because-Scott's-so-slow-he-should-die-and-rot-so-let's-do-it-now-before-Baldie-scans-our-minds!" slurred Pietro before they were buzzed out.   
  
"Alright a thousand points to Pyro and Pietro, two thousand to Piotr for suggesting that you kill Scott and two thousand to Logan for being Logan." she told the four dodging an optic blast. "Next is worlds worst, reasons to color your hair."  
  
"Hey if I dye my hair red and grow it out until Halloween I can scare the new recruits! Heh Jean is scary two is unimaginable!" shouted Logan with a mad scientist look on his face. Of course he was buzzed so Pietro and Piotr stepped down.  
  
"What do you mean my hair is an unhealthy color for my age? Your hair is metal half the time!" yelled Pietro. **BUZZZZZ**   
  
"They'll never find me with brown hair never so Wanda and I can live—-" Pyro was interrupted by a buzz.  
  
"Alright time for the break! There will be more whose line when we get back!" yelled Ky running off to talk to the four guys during the break.  
  
(Commercial 1 Jean is in a blue suit with a bookcase and desk behind her)  
  
"Hi, I'm Jean Grey. If you've been injured by a rampaging mutant and other law claims won't take your case call 1-800-LAW-FIRM so we can help you get back on your feet or wheels or tentacles... or whatever you have. 1-800-LAW-FIRM. I COMMAND YOU TO CALL IT!  
  
(Commercial 1 fades out with Jean still commanding you to call it.)  
  
(Commercial 2 has Ky sitting in a hammock)  
  
"Hi, I'm Ky Williamson. Mutant and host of the show 'Whose Line is it Evoways? I like Harry's Hammocks because they have anti-power ropes. Yes Rogue and Scott they'll work for you. Why Even Logan will shrivel up and die on these. Oops. I shouldn't of said that. Um Sabretooth, Magneto and you guys make your own power inhibitors to kill him. He's mine and I won't let you kill him!"   
  
(Commercial 2 ends as Ky is drug off by the nice men in white coats as chapter 1 ends and author dialog begins)  
  
Hi everyone! Review even if you think it sucked like heck. Yes heck. Not hell. If it sucked like that go away.   
  
-The evil teenage girl known as bobtheheadlesschicken 


	2. FIRE BAD! Only you can prevent soundstag...

Hi I would put your names but open office hates them. It's locked up every time I try to put your precious names in. But you all get 50 Km points at ! Yay! Claps anyways back to the show.... Oh and if you don't know Ky's channeling my emotions.  
  
(Commercial 3 has Remy in his usual attire With a fire behind him)  
  
"If ya neva see me 'gain Pyro killed Remy. I'm 'ot sure Ah c'n take it. Pyro lit mah cards. All of 'em. SAVE MEH!  
  
(It ends with the screen popping into the middle of an Advil commercial)  
  
"So I got something with 'Mutant pains' in the title. And now My hands don't hurt duuude!"  
  
(End commercial for Advil. Oh and 50 points to the first reviewer who gets the cameo)  
  
"And we're back to Whose Line is it Evoways? I don't quite get the name. Do you guys?" she asked the people in the audience. They all shook there head except a little boy he nodded.  
  
"It's cause there's this show called----" his mother quickly clamped a hand on his mouth. The characters can't know they ain't real now can they?  
  
"Alright next is two line vocabulary! This is for all of you. The lucky person without having his speech whittled down is Pietro cause he told me he'd kill me if I didn't do that. Pyro you can say: Oooh can I light it on fire? And Stop that ya mean idiot!"   
  
Pyro took this time to make a joke. "Can I set that on fire?" pointing to Logan.   
  
"NO! His phrases are: I need a beer and I'm not drunk enough to do that yet. Piotr gets to say I'm metal, dude and FIRE BAD! Only you can prevent sound stage fires." she stopped at this letting him know that they were the real phrases. "Oh and your at an empty sound stage. Locked in with a keg of beer. And go!"  
  
"Alright-Logan-we-can-use-your-claws-to-cut-out-of-the-building. Let's-go!"  
  
shouted the speedster springing into action.  
  
"I'm not drunk enough to do that yet. I need a beer" he stated using an imaginary tap.  
  
"Can I set that on fire?" asked Pyro of the beer.  
  
"FIRE BAD only you can prevent sound stage fires!"  
  
"Stop that ya mean idiot!"  
  
"Guys-we-need-to-get-something-metal-and-ram-it-up-against-the-door!"  
  
"I'm metal Dude!" he paused "FEAR ME!"  
  
**BUZZ**  
  
"Alright 400 to Logan for both games 3000 to Pietro because he complimented me during the break and now he gets an extra 100 so 3100."  
  
"I-called-you-freaky-idiot." said a po'ed speed demon.  
  
"Isn't he nice? 2000 for Pyro for threatening Logan. And 1500 to Piotr for breaking the rules." she paused for drama. "Next is... Let's make a date! Pyro is a Bachelorette trying to find out what's wrong with the other three. Guys get ready... set... go!" she shouted.  
  
"Bachelor One If you were a movie star who would you be?"  
  
"I am and I'm Hugh Jackman duh. I'm in those Z-men or whatever." stated Logan bored with the words Hugh Jackman in white on the screen.  
  
"Okay, If you were on a shipwrecked island with me what would you do?" asked Pyro.  
  
The words Captain Jack Sparrow popped up on Pietro when he said,"I'd-get- you-to drink-rum. A-LOT-of-rum-and-then-well... teach-you-pirate-songs!"  
  
"Oo. Bachelor number three. If you took me on a date where would we go?"  
  
The words Fictional Character was Piotr's doom. "I vould take you to my book or tv show and introduce you."  
  
**BUZZ**  
  
"Alright Logan's Hugh Jackman. Pietro's Jack Sparrow? Is Piotr himself? Just kidding. He's a fictional character. Good job mates."  
  
"LOGAN WINS! See you next time on Whose Line is it Evoways? With no Logan next time..." Ky sadly admitted. "BUT Remy will be there. Mmmmm."  
  
Bye peeps! I'll try to update more frequently. I hope this saves good. 


	3. The author's temper is very short

All right, guess the contest about Advil is won! Congrats crazysilverkitty. Oh the site didn't come out so I'll fix that. Its:   
  
Ripdos- Liked it but I don't watch that much Inuyasha so a wee bit confusing.  
  
To all my other reviewers Glad you liked it. Wow adding 'comedy' to a story's genre gives me a lot more reviews then my longer story oh well. Whee.  
  
Chapter 3 and Episode 2. Host:Ky, Regular:Remy, Others: Kurt, Scott (snicker snicker) and Toad.  
  
"Welcome to Whose Line is it Evoways? Where the points don't matter like if Scott has his glasses or not. He'll still ruin the fun somehow." Ky joked. Scott didn't like the joke and voiced his opinion. By blasting the desk. "HEY! I paid for that to!"  
  
"Remy tink dat Cyke is over reacting, non?" Remy asked.  
  
"Well he can rethink his actions while Kurt and Todd get to play... Sound effects! Well I need two volunteers from the audience! Three guesses who! Jesse, Jillian come on down! Jesse does Todd's sound effects and Jillian does Kurt's." she explained. Two black haired friends head's nodded as the green eyed girl with demonic wings and teeth readied for Kurt and The ordinary looking boy readied for Todd's worst. "The scene is Kurt and Todd are acting out is they are fans who are forced to sit next to each other at a uh hockey game. Yea hockey game. START BEFORE CYCLOPS ZAPS YOU FOR SAYING THAT!" everyone looked at Kurt and Toad when Kurt just looked innocence.  
  
"Vhat? All I said vas that you couldn't----"  
  
"You said Scott couldn't spell fun if he had to get his glasses back in a hangman game." she pointed out.  
  
"Damn her hearing. Must be vorking on it vith Sabretooth," whispered Kurt.  
  
"Continue before Scott or I kill you though Scott seems to be taking it well," stated Ky noting that Scott wasn't blasting him.  
  
"I don't blast team members. I blast Acolytes and the Brotherhood." he calmly pointed out.  
  
"Hey! I was an X-man... for about 10 hours... Okay I get your point. On with it!" shouted Ky.  
  
"Go Coyotes!" yelled Kurt picking up a hot dog and mustard. He squirted it on while saying, "Mm hot dog with mustard."  
  
"Squink, splutter splutter." (the first part try to slurp an imaginary noodle)   
  
"Darn mustard must be out. Veird." he looked at the tip of it and Jillian got an idea.  
  
"Splot."  
  
"Mien eye!" he yelled. "Ow! Hey you have anything that could help?" he asked of Todd.  
  
"Chomp chomp." put in Jesse as Todd opened and closed his mouth.  
  
"Put it on your hot dog dumb blue. Go Hurricanes! Die Arizona!"  
  
"HEY! Arizona rocks. They're teams might suck but use they're names not the state," shouted Ky angrily.  
  
"Sorry miss host. Die Coyotes!" yelled Todd. He mimed hitting glass and Jesse made a shattering noise. "Whoops."  
  
"Mien eye is burning and all you can do is think about how you shattered glass? Ouch that had to hurt that guy. Oh no! My accent!"  
  
"Dude this author must not know German very well." explained Todd. They all looked around as a voice came out of now where.  
  
"Ich bin der Autor! Sie beleidigen mich den ich werde machen Sie zahlen. BWAHAHAHA! Mein Name ist keiner von Ihrem Geschäft."  
  
"Kurt, English translation?" asked Scott.  
  
Ky piped up before Kurt could open his mouth. "I am the author! You insult me I shall make you pay. BWAHAHAHA! My name is none of your business." she rattled off. "What? They teach me stuff at school... usually... after some motivation.. now I can swear at Kurt in THREE languages. BAKA!" she started laughing maniacally. "Oh guess it's time for scenes from a hat!" she pulled out a gun looked at and put it back. "I said HAT!" she then pulled out a hat with pieces of paper in them. "Alright, Best ways to annoy... original characters..."  
  
"Hey look! Some broke teenager or adult owns you while Marvel makes money off of every optic blast I make! HA!" Scott was buzzed so he went back to the steps. Kurt quickly walked down.  
  
"I'm on the tv show and you aren't! I'm suing because this author can't do my accent! Vait a minute. Ooh it's a selective accent Ja."  
  
"Remy tink you betta step back up befor Ky blows fuse non?"  
  
"Right on to... Worst cleaning product commercial."  
  
"Remy claims that this works fifta percen' of da time! Da odder time it makes it worse." **BUZZ**  
  
"Well this takes the scorch marks of my optic blasts out... guaranteed 0% success rate!" **BUZZ**  
  
"Next is... ways to get authors to yell at you..." she stated blinking at this. "Whoever wrote that down is going to be dead next episode."  
  
"That was me but I'll use telepathy and telekinetic power to stop her!" Jean shouted. Again the voice came out from nowhere.  
  
"Go on with the game! You shall never escape the delete key Jean BWAHAHAHA!"   
  
"Yo! The authors name is , yo and lives on the street---"  
  
**BUZZ**   
  
"Ja, this author vho hates going all mushy is located at the #(36----"  
  
**BUZZ  
**  
"Alright time for the break!"  
  
(Commercial 1 has Ky behind a desk)  
  
"Hi everyone! I'm as you know host of Whose Line is it Evoways? Now for those tickets call 1-800-425-3312! That number is 1-800-425-3312! If you'd like to be a comedian please apply. Jean and Professor aren't allowed to participate. Magneto can if he wants too. Now remember 1-800-425-3312." she waves her hand Jedi style and the number pops on the screen. "You are encouraged to call."  
  
(Commercial 1 ends)  
  
(Commercial 2 starts with Professor Xavier in a suit.)  
  
"At X-Harmony .com you'll find the match of your life with powers similar or complementary to yours. That's not the only thing. It will also match you with someone who is compatible with you. Listen to these couples!"  
  
"The Sheila and I have powers to create or to control fire respectively. X-harmony brought us together mate. It'll match ya up good too." ((A.n. sorry if I mutilated his accent... or Remy's... or Kurt's...))  
  
"Now go to X-harmony to find you a Significant other."  
  
(Commercial 2 ends along with the chapter as author notes begins)  
  
Sorry it took me sooo long! I had a sleepover wed. and I have a job. Plus this Sat. is the fair turn in date! I had to sew about everyday this week. I hate pins...  
  
-The evil known as Bobtheheadlesschicken   
  
P.S. You can suggest stuff a know. Oh Three headed Star is next episode k guys? 


	4. And 0 points to Scott for Dodging

Wow. It's been A LONG time. Sooo um right you want the story eh? Well next week is camp (authoress ducks behind her keyboard) so I leave Monday get back Friday and Yesterday was bracelet day at the fair from noon to 5 all rides can be payed for by just a single payment of 18.50 I thinketh. Arg oh and I have a job I repeat I have a job. Monday, Tuesday, FRIDAY and every other Saturday. Oh and this chapter is brought to you by CANDY DOTS YAY SUGAR! Oh and at anytime you thought I owned anything other then Ky and the plot you are a sad sad person. My name is not Stan Lee or whoever owns Marvel. Oh if I had a genie though....

(Commercial 3 has Kitty holding up a strip of... CANDY DOTS!)

"Candy Dots are so like good because they are like colored sugar. Do you know what I mean? They are so totally awesome!"

(Commercial 3 ends as Kitty gets yanked off by one of those hooks that yank off people that do really bad. )

"Alright welcome back. Remy and Todd are tied with Kurt next and Scott has.... 0 points! Imagine that.... wonder what he did..." Ky acts stupid like she has no idea that Scott tried to kill her during the break. "Okay time for dun dun dun.... PROPS!" Ky brings out a huge playing card and hands it to Scott and Remy. Kurt and Todd got a large half circle with triangles coming out. Think Pikachu without arms or legs.

"Remy t'ink tis be fo' him ta blow up." **BUZZ**

"Omigod yo they killed PIKA!" **BUZZ**

"So Remy got any queens?" **BUZZETH**

"That is one big tooth ja?" **LAUGH LAUGH BUZZ**

"Will you deal already?" asked Scott dodging Ky's throw of the Buzzer.

"Props done. Remy and Kurt get some Todd gets some less and Scott gets none cuz he dodged... Alright let's see one more game before the end. So how about.... changed letter or whatever. It's where ya say a letter for a different one so if p was g it would be 'soda gog' not soda pop BUT it's R to F so Femy staft the found youf at a company picnic."

"Femy think he will not enjoy this found. Ffiends come join meh. Ffiends do you t'ink Femy will getta pfom'in? Femy t'ink so." Remy stated.

""Maybe yo. Dunno if boss man will pfomote you Femy, hey Femy! Like a gifl!" Todd shouted Before he knew it he was subject of an exploding card. "I take it you didn't like my joke. Hey look no 'f's NOT THE AUTHOF NO! Affo weafing fobots fan fings afound Pietfo."

"Vhen did affo weafing fobots fan fings afound Pietfo?" asked Kurt.

"Yestefday silly Kuft didn't you watch the tfack meet?" asked Scott. Ky of course couldn't stop the madness. She had thrown her buzzer at Scott so she thought of something.

"Buzzing bees fuled at the fock conceft **BUZZ**." when Ky thought about what she said she kinda sunk in her chair. There was a certain young boy from a few chapters ago still in the audience."Alright Remy and Kurt win so it's Three Headed Broadway Star Any unlikely Broadway plays to suggest...?"

"Jackie And Jims!"

"Mutants!"

"Ok mutants I guess. Show stopping tunes?"

"I can't control it you try!" yelled Rogue. She had accidently bumped Piotr unconscious and was fighting Kitty.

"Oo good one. She hopped up on stage as Todd sat down with the fixed buzzer. Well as fixed as RDA's duct tape will do. Better give it back now. Oh and Kurt and Ky are enemies so it's Ky then Remy then Kurt.

"I"

"Can't"

"Control"

"My"

"Powehs"

"You"

"Try"

"Toooooo."

"Oops."

"I"

"Blasted"

"Your"

"Girlfriend's"

"Head"

"Offff"

"You"

"Should

"Have"

"Warned"

"Her"

"Better"

"I"

"Am"

"Not"

"Going"

"To"

"A---"

"Pol---"

"Ogize!" she paused "See ya next time with Remy, Wolvie and some other peeps! Right now I gotta kill Scott..."

Whee time for sleep then camp. YAY CAMP! IT ROX! I'm not there right now though so don't expect any updates anytime soon k? Oh review its only the distance of three cursors down. I measured. (smiles in childish delight) GO CANDY DOTS SEE YA SATURDAY AT THE SOONEST! I'll try ta write at camp. In the very experimental works- X men evolution- Trading Bases... REVIEW!

-The slightly evil and hyper teenager known as Bobtheheadlesschicken


	5. Ouch t'at hurt meh

I'm back from camp and rested up. YAY! I had to walk up to get to my A-Frame cabin at Camp Evergreen. It was fun but I missed my bed. In the words of an Elacoy (A fifth year that gets to terrorize the firsties) 'I dreamed that I was sleeping on a rock and then I woke up and realized I was. The mattress.' Well with out further ado Chapter Five of Whose Line is it Evoways? Host:Jillian, Normals:Remy, Wolverine. Extras:Magneto and Wanda... what will happen? You have to read to know! BWAHAHAHA! Oh know the words on the screen will be in ( )'s.

"Hi and welcome to Whose Line is it Evoways? I'm Jillian filling in for Ky who's out cold with a tranq--- I mean at camp. Hehe camp. Oh yeah the points are made up and matter as much as if Remy's trying to use his powers on Ky or not. Well let's see the first game is party quirks for all of you! Now the first person is Wolverine who's hosting a party. He has to figure out what the three people are acting out. They haven't seen the envelopes before blah blah blah. Begin I'll ringeth the doorbell." the girl told them.

"Alright if anyone pukes on my new shoes I'll skin 'em alive." Logan stated. **Ding dong **Wanda stood at the door. (Drunk who pukes on people's shoes and then denies it) "Come on in BEFORE I skin ya alive."

"What a welcoming request. Uh oh the ceiling is spinning. BLECH!"

"You barfed on my shoes!" yelled Logan trying not to pop his claws, of course Wanda didn't really barf on 'em.

"No I didn't."

**DING DONG!** "I'll come back to you."

Remy waited at the door until Logan opened the door. Remy just barged in. (Detective who thinks Logan murdered Ky.) "Where were you the night of Ky's disappearance? And can anyone back up your story?"

"Woah. I was here alone and no one can back me up but I would like to file a claim about the drunk who has---" Logan was cut short by a bleching noise on Wanda's part over Remy's shoes. **DING DONG!** "I wonder who that could be."

Logan opened the 'door' to greet Magneto. (Rabbit who needs to find a respective other.) Magneto hopped in on all fours and smelled Logan's shoes. Then hopped away in fear. He hopped and smelled the equally frightening pair of shoes on Remy. He hopped to Wanda and she glared at him. Hands blue hoping he'd get the hint not to come anywhere near her. And he did. "Alright Detective I'd like to file a claim about this drunk who barfs on shoes and then forgets...?" **BUZZ** Wanda sat at her chair back up the stairs because Logan figured her out.

"D'y' 'ave a re'terd gun? Or weapon?"

"Now I don't have a registered gun. I didn't kill Ky alright detective. Or kidnap her." he stated. **Buzz** Remy joined Wanda but got hexed into his own chair.

"Ouch t'at hurt me."

"Are you looking for a she-bunny?" asked Logan of the Master of magnetism.

"All right Logan you solved their oddities. Next game is 'Hats' Remy and Logan get one box and Magneto and Wanda get the other. Start when ready. "Jillian stated. Logan pulled out a tiara and put it over his eyes so he had pink feathers blocking his vision.

"Hello I'm Scott Summers. I--" **BUZZ**

Magneto walked out with a bald cap on. "Hello I'm Professor Xavier. I know if you are lying... I won't let you break up with me because if you do you'll wind up a tree..." his Christmas song parody got laughter and a **BUZZ**

Remy walked out with a long dirty blond wig on. "Hello. Meh name is Sabertooth. Meh sworn enemy is Wolvie ova there." **BUZZ**

Wanda stepped down with a white wig gelled back. "Hello-my-name's-Pietro-and-I-have-at-least-5-dates-a-day-so-I-hope-you-don't-mind" Wanda's speech would have impressed Pietro. Before he realized she was dissing him bad. She got up and rummaged through the box.

Logan had the long blond wig on that wasn't dirty. (A.n. I like taking things literally) "Hi I'm Belladonna and I'm willing to pay you if you find Remy Lebeau for meh." he was buzzed and Magneto had a red and purple bucket on his head. No not his helmet a bucket. "Hello I'm Magneto."

"WE KNOW!" shouted the audience.

"Well umm commercial break!"

[Commercial 1 is the Dell one but with Kitty and Rogue]

[Commercial 2 has Wolverine with a blow dart gun and Remy with another over who's that? KY!]

"Hello we've decided to open a shooting range full of the rare Insanieus Annoyingius Girlius." Logan told the camera pointing at Ky. She rolled over and muttered something along the lines of 'camp is evil' and her hand shot up into the air swatting an imaginary mosquito. But hit Logan's knee. "She must be stirring. Remy ready the ammo."

[Commercial 2 ends and author notes start.]

Hi I wa trying to update but I started this on the computer downstairs so that meant I got a lot less time on it. Here it is. Love it? Hate it? Want Ky to be host again? She'll be back next chapter.... until then.

-Bobtheheadlesschicken


End file.
